Day 13: Fuck it, I'm Becoming my Halloween Costume

This year, didn't we all come up with costumes like an hour before going out, because fuck if any of us had the energy to do Halloween? I know I was like that.

I grabbed a hot pink dress from my closet, painted on loud pink eyeliner and clipped in neon colored hair extensions, and meandered off to a backyard party full of strangers.

As an icebreaker they'd ask, "What are you?"

I told them, "I'm making 2020 a brighter place."

This month is a heavy one for me. I'm going through some big life changes and I'm scared. I've been quiet and a bit dark lately.

I'm torn between honoring the heavy mental space I'm in, and just saying 'fuck this' and doing everything I can to embody that bright girl at the Halloween party.

Writing this now, I can hear that fighting voice inside of me say, "YOUS A COLORFUL BAD BITCH, THE BEST PART OF YOU IS THE BRIGHT, SWEET, MAGICAL PART, DON'T LET LIFE BEAT YOU WITH ITS OLD MAN CANE!"

I guess my inner voice is drunk? Well, whatever she's on, she's lighting a fire in me that no amount of change or fear can put out.

I may be a bit overwhelmed right now, but I will stumble-dance my way through it and do my utmost best to make this world a brighter place!

And I want you to join me!