This year, didn't we all come up with costumes like an hour before going out, because fuck if any of us had the energy to do Halloween? I know I was like that.
I grabbed a hot pink dress from my closet, painted on loud pink eyeliner and clipped in neon colored hair extensions, and meandered off to a backyard party full of strangers.
As an icebreaker they'd ask, "What are you?"
I told them, "I'm making 2020 a brighter place."
This month is a heavy one for me. I'm going through some big life changes and I'm scared. I've been quiet and a bit dark lately.
I'm torn between honoring the heavy mental space I'm in, and just saying 'fuck this' and doing everything I can to embody that bright girl at the Halloween party.
Writing this now, I can hear that fighting voice inside of me say, "YOUS A COLORFUL BAD BITCH, THE BEST PART OF YOU IS THE BRIGHT, SWEET, MAGICAL PART, DON'T LET LIFE BEAT YOU WITH ITS OLD MAN CANE!"
I guess my inner voice is drunk? Well, whatever she's on, she's lighting a fire in me that no amount of change or fear can put out.
I may be a bit overwhelmed right now, but I will stumble-dance my way through it and do my utmost best to make this world a brighter place!
And I want you to join me!