Chuck Palahniuk (Fight Club author) read my story
Palahniuk is referencing my short story, SLC Fever Dream.
How did I get him to read it? I'll tell you in a sec. The good news? He might read your story, too! First, I took his advice and made the first sentence in the story, That Madi cocooned herself in her house with no spiders, hated spiders, spiders scared her.
This one change revealed fluff throughout the rest of the story, so I made edits to the whole thing and then showed it to my family, who agree that this result is better than the original.
Here is the original (SLC Fever Dream), and below it is the rewritten version from Chuck's advice:
Nomad Fever Dream
That Madi cocooned herself in her house with no spiders, hated spiders, spiders scared her.
Such a stable, predictable woman. Gossiping with her massive social circle on her massive velvet couch on repeat for 4 years.
I could tell you I miss her. I could also tell you that a gaggle of baby arachnids scurried around the shower floor today and I was like, great, I haven't showered with company in a while, turned on the water, and got in with them.
This Madi owns no house, knows no one. From social commitments six days a week, to silence broken only by the shuffling of different sets of eight tiny legs.
Each night is a fever dream. Sleep, when? Wake, where? It's pitch dark, it's bright out, it's pitch dark, it's bright out, what time is it? Galaxies and strobe lights flash on the bedroom walls. Red yellow pink green red yellow pink green slept 4 hours last night. Dreams of fragments and splinters and color and chaos. Dreams of places I never knew existed, dreams of places that don't exist yet, dreams of the future dreams of the past dreams of alternate realities and visions of pink green red yellow pink green red
And dreams of you.
Just kidding. Never dreams of you.
"Are you so sure?" You ask behind me, the gravel in your voice like sandpaper on my skin, so close the hairs on my neck prickle.
My eyes snap open and I inhale sharply as a brown recluse crawls slowly over my cornea.
Better, yes? Starts with action, cuts out the fluff.
So, Chuck. I attended his book launch in Portland last year, expecting some formal 'question answer' type of panel, but instead got a full-on theatrical performance in the dark with glow sticks and performers in costumes, that totally blew my mind, where he taught us as much about writing as he could in two hours. What I learned that night changed the way I write today.
The man has a clear passion for teaching writing craft. So I subscribed to his newsletter, which is so useful it's a detriment to him, because I've gate kept it and I bet others do, too.
Sometimes Palahniuk asks for short story submissions. He goes through as many as he can and takes the time to give actionable, thoughtful commentary. And that's how he read my story. I highly recommend his newsletter to anyone who is serious about becoming an excellent writer. His writing advice is like getting an MFA.
Taking the time to personally help his readers speaks volumes to his character.
I hope to give back in the same way someday, too.
PS: If you're a new subscriber, hi! Respond to this email and intro yourself. These emails are pretty casual/unstructured, and I hope they feel a little like getting letters from a long-lost friend.
-Madi