reward with softness

Masters of any craft are soft, and that softness is a reward.

My date said that while partner dancing, he only signals his next move bluntly when the follow doesn't respond. Once she responds, he goes straight back to being subtle again. If he keeps pushing every move, no one enjoys the dance.

He says new dancers (or entrepreneurs or creators) are all ego. They want to learn every move and show off, and it ends up being sloppy and loud and harsh. The really good dancers probably look boring to them, because they stick to the basics. But they do the basics REALLY WELL, elegantly, with subtlelty.

You have to go soft to be the best.

And softness is a reward.

It reminds me of relationships– the deeper the relationship, the softer it is.

We can all look across a room and with one slight nod or twitch of an eye, convey an entire conversation to our best friend. It's almost telepathy, how subtle our communication can be.

It's something that's so barely perceptible it feels like magic. We'll be holding back laughter over some inside joke that only took a single eyebrow raise to conjure, and no one can tell that we're having the time of our lives, silently, on opposite sides of the room.

And that softness is the greatest reward.